The Transition

Finally. It is over. 

It's the transition now. 

I've graduated from Year 12, from VCASS. I've actually made it through these two crazy, hectic, memorable, challenging years! I am so thankful to God. For all the times I had to lean on His strength and find the passion to continue. For all the times I failed big time and made the wrong decisions. For all the times He saved my skin and helped me keep going and trusting! 

I have always looked at my future in VCASS and wondered if I'll make it through. And of course, by the grace of God, I did! 


As I reflect on the year, I realized it has been the best year of my life! It has been so, so, so good. I thank God again and again for giving me all the opportunities I had! The highlights are finally having muso friends who understand me and I understand them. We share the same passion and drive. We love life and we love hanging out (only after we've done substantial practice ofcourse...). Haha what more can I ask for? 


I also LOVED playing in the piano trio with Troy and Justine. One of the best experiences I've had doing music. The most amazing thing is playing with other people who are also passionate about the music, and who feel the same thing you do! It is the best feeling ever. I love it, and I thank God for answering my prayer. 


How far I've come! The first time I performed in VCASS, I had a terrible memory lapse. I wasn't nervous, but I wasn't used to performing in that kind of a focused environment either. But with God's help, how far I've come in two years! There is nothing to boast. Only a heart filled with thankfulness because I know I've not done it by my own strength. I can testify that God has answered my prayers. The prayers I prayed when there seemed no way out of Malaysia; when there seemed no hope that I would be able to pursue music, much less perform it for others, even much less get into an arts school in Melbourne! 


It is amazing. I remember also praying that I'll get the chance to compose. At the time I was limited. I was homeschooled, I've never performed before, I've never composed a single ensemble piece apart from my simplistic piano compositions. This year God answered my prayer some more! I got to perform my composition in the year-end compositions concert and I finally have the avenue and opportunities to perform and share my music. 


It is amazing, not because I am, but because God is! 


Sometimes I wonder, am I just kidding myself? Isn't all this just my own hard work and effort? I have plenty of friends who don't seem to be praying but seem to still be doing better than I am. It doesn't make sense! And it is a hard thing to write about or rationalize in the context of my faith. But I choose to believe God, and trust, and keep on believing. I know that He's helped me.       


God has been faithful to our family too. The days when we had no money to pay the rent, the money would come in, the exact amount, through people who really have no reason to bless us. Through all this, we know that if we keep following Jesus and holding on to this hope, God will provide for us. It does not mean at all that we sit around and wait for heaven to come. Dad has had to work hard and he's had to do all kinds of jobs. We had to adjust. I had to practice. We all have to do what we have to do. What is beyond us, God can and will do. But we must still do our part. Without God, there is no story. Without us, we are part of no story. 


Dad says, it's always 100% God AND 100% man. 


I haven't worked very hard at all this year. I haven't been disciplined many times. But I'm thankful I made it through. Year 12 isn't a big thing, studies isn't a big thing. I want to do well, but at the same time, I will not forget God in a bid to do well in the things of this world. Never forget that, Janielle. God is your source, God is your strength. If you forget Him, you may gain the whole world - but what's the point if you lose your own soul? 


Now I'm on holiday. I feel free. I'm gonna bury myself in books - autobiographies and Lord of the Rings and Christian literature! Woohoo :D I am determined to spend my holidays fruitfully. I need to spend time with my family. I'm gonna catch up with individuals. I'm gonna read heaps and prepare for next year. I'm gonna practice and also pick up some jazz. I'm gonna aim to acquire more music students for 2012! 


Because I'm trying to be disciplined and focused and fruitful these holidays (3 months!!!), I decided to give up my phone (which is a major source of distraction) and use Janna's terribly old brick phone. Haha man, the good old days when there was no Facebook (I still use it though), no qwerty keys or touch screens, no Youtube or internet access on the phone. So much less distraction! 


I need to write more. I need to think more and reflect and pray. I forget and I am lazy to do these things. But they are essential to my soul! God, I need you! Let me not live my ignorant life and enjoy myself. Let me not be disinterested in other people's needs. Let me not be so self-absorbed that I see no one else. Open my eyes. Help me to live my life right and use my time wisely. Thank You God for this incredible year. Thank You for dad and mum. Thank You for bringing our whole family here. Thank You for VCASS. Thank You for music. Thank You for blessing me with like-minded friends and driven peers. Thank You for being with me every step of the way. Thank You God. 

‘Anthrax isn’t scary at all compared to this’: Man-made flu virus with potential to wipe out many millions if it ever escaped is created in research lab

“For nation shall rise against nation, and kingdom against kingdom: and there shall be famines, and pestilences and earthquakes, in divers places.”
—Matthew 24:7

A group of scientists is pushing to publish research about how they created a man-made flu virus that could potentially wipe out civilisation. The deadly virus is a genetically tweaked version of the H5N1 bird flu strain, but is far more infectious and could pass easily between millions of people at a time. The research has caused a storm of controversy and divided scientists, with some saying it should never have been carried out.

The current strain of H5N1 has only killed 500 people and is not contagious enough to cause a global pandemic.
But their are fears the modified virus is so dangerous it could be used for bio-warfare, if it falls into the wrong hands.

Virologist Ron Fouchier of the Erasmus Medical Centre in the Netherlands lead a team of scientists who discovered that a mere five mutations to the avian virus was sufficient to make it spread far more easily.
He conducted his tests on ferrets as the animals have become a model of choice for influenza and have similar respiratory tracts to humans.

Fouchier is so prepared for a media storm that he has hired an advisor to help him work on a communication strategy.

The research done was part of an international drive to understand H5N1 more fully.
Fouchier admitted the strain is ‘one of the most dangerous viruses you can make’ but is still adamant he wants to publish a paper describing how it was done. The study is one of two which has caused serious debate about scientific freedom and about regulating research which might have potential public health benefits but at the same time could also be useful for bio-terrorism.

The other paper, also on H5N1, was done by a joint team at the University of Wisconsin and the University of Tokyo. It is understood to have had comparable results to the study done by Fouchier. Both papers are now being reviewed by the U.S National Science Advisory Board for Biosecurity (NSABB).

NSABB does not have the power to prevent the publication but it could ask journals not to publish.
Paul Keim, chairman of NSABB, said: ‘I can’t think of another pathogenic organism that is as scary as this one. I don’t think anthrax is scary at all compared to this.’ Traditionally scientific research has always been open so that fellow scientists can review the work of others and repeat their methods to try and learn from them.

But numerous scientists have said they believe research on the avian flu should be suppressed.
However bio-defense and flu expert Michael Osterholm, who is director of the Center for Infectious Disease Research and Policy at the University of innesota, said the work carried out was important medically.
He added he could not discuss the papers because he was a member of NSABB but said if they were published certain information could be withheld and made available to those who really need to know.
‘We don’t want to give bad guys a road map on how to make bad bugs really bad,’ he said.

Source: www.inthedays.com

In the Dark

Just now I had a little bicker with my sister. When I retreated to my room to play the piano, she got really annoyed that I was playing past 9 o’clock. So she stormed in, pushed me, headed out, turned off the lights and slammed the door shut. For a brief moment I was left in the dark. I was very annoyed, angry, and then for some reason, afraid. It’s that sudden sinking feeling in your heart that you get when someone plays a nasty trick on you, and leaves you in the dark alone.

It is a horrible feeling. It was a small incident, but when I reflected on it, I found a metaphorical parallel to what must be the experience of countless individuals and abandoned children out there who have had the door slammed shut in their faces; who have been left in the dark – alone, cold and fearful. It is a terrible situation to be in.

I have never been abandoned, so I’ll never know. All I can imagine is that it must be a gazillion times worse than what I felt when my sister pulled that surprise on me and left me momentarily stunned in the dark.

I feel terrible and sick to the stomach thinking about the millions of kids out there who have been orphaned, betrayed by their parents, and left in the darkness to fend for themselves, whether literally or figuratively. No one likes being left in the dark. And you don’t know what to do.

Jesus told his disciples, ‘You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand so that it gives light to everyone in the house.’ Matthew 5

The world lives in darkness because man has chosen to stay in the dark and turn away from God. But those who choose to embrace the light will see the truth and find hope at once! Then again, there are those who had the doors slammed shut on them. They had no choice. They never had the chance to see the light, nor hear the truth, or receive love and hope. How can that be?

Those of us who have embraced the light (if we truly have), should not have our lamps hidden under a bowl! We should shine like a city on a hill, like a lamp on its stand, so that everyone in darkness will see by this light. Do not be afraid to shine. There are many who hate the light because it exposes the things they do in the dark. But there are plenty more who need the light, and who do not yet know it until its brilliance is revealed!

The light should never be intimidated by the darkness. Because no matter how black the darkness is, the light will still glow, even if it is a flicker. It will ignite warmth and hope in the hearts of those who have been abandoned, disillusioned, and left to rot in the dark. Do not hide your light! The world needs it. The world who does not know that it is in the darkness until it sees the light.

Distracted, Like the Rest of the World

Henri Nouwen describes our contemporary lives:

‘One of the most obvious characteristics of our daily lives is that we are busy. Our lives often seem like over-packed suitcases bursting at the seams. In fact, we are almost always aware of being behind schedule. There is a nagging sense that there are unfinished tasks, unfulfilled promises, unrealized proposals. There is always something else that we should have remembered, done or said. Thus, although we are very busy, we have a lingering feeling of never really fulfilling our obligations…

Beneath our worrying lives, however, something else is going on. While our mind and hearts are filled with many things, and we wonder how we can live up to the expectations imposed upon us by ourselves and others, we have a deep sense of unfulfillment. While busy with and worried about many things, we seldom feel truly satisfied, at peace, at home. A gnawing sense of being unfulfilled underlies our filled lives…

The great paradox of our time is that many of us are busy and bored at the same time. While running from one event to the next, we wonder in our innermost selves if anything is really happening. While we can hardly keep up with our many tasks and obligations, we are not so sure that it would make any difference if we did nothing at all. While people keep pushing us in all directions, we doubt if anyone really cares. In short, while our lives are full, we are unfulfilled.’

Now I only have two words to add, ‘TRUE THAT!’

Epiphany

"God is not like a human being; it is not important for God to have visible evidence so that he can see if his cause has been victorious or not; he sees in secret just as well. Moreover, it is so far from being the case that you should help God to learn anew that it is rather he who will help you to learn anew, so that you are weaned from the worldly point of view that insists on visible evidence. A decision in the external sphere is what Christianity does not want; (...) rather it wants to test the individual’s faith."

Soren Kierkegaard

A Penchant for Words

I love writing. You can never know what epiphany emerges from a little musing, a little writing.

I'm actually excited for my last Literature exam tomorrow! Right, I haven't 'studied' much for it at all. But I've written a lot and I've thought a lot about the views and values within the texts. I really enjoy all that. Sometimes I dislike the fact that we've to analyse and try to give meaning to a mere man's words. Sometimes it's terribly pointless. Why the heck am I studying the words of someone who probably wrote it out of a whim and without giving it much thought? I myself do the same thing. Why am I scrutinizing something when I can just enjoy it, think about it, muse over it? Why am I trying to pluck out meaning from the air?

Of all things, sometimes I really dislike studying these novels and plays. Yes, some of them do have good values and views and philosophy interwoven in them. But through many classes I sit there thinking if only I spent this much time studying GOD'S WORD. God's word is very much more worth studying. The times when I do meditate on the Word, when I do ponder over the Truth and write about it, my spirit feels nourished. Why the heck am I filling myself with mindless words, words of mere men? Yes, some of it is good, but I've got to remember first things first.

First things first. God, help me to remember You and to abide in Your truth.